It takes a lot of effort sometimes to hate something – and this week, we’re pondering whether it’s actually worth it.
Hello, and a very warm welcome to the spot on the site where we chat about things that may be affecting us or those around us. Our focus is in and around mental health, but each week we chat about something just a little different. No miracle cures are offered, but hopefully over the course of the series of articles, there’ll be something of use.
This time around, a little bit of stating the obvious perhaps. But heck, sometimes that doesn’t hurt.
I’ve been working to a mix of music this week, which is the catalyst for this particular piece. I just selected a random mix of songs from an online playlist, and got down to work. Then it came to Celine Dion’s My Heart Will Go On. I don’t like this song, and I’ve always said that the extended version is what I want played at my funeral. I love the idea of people having to sit there and suffer it!
But as the music played, it was only as I got to the end of the song that I realised it hadn’t really bothered me at all. It was just there. I’m still not fond of the song at all, but I did begin to wonder whether I disliked it intently previously because I made an effort to do so. That I went out of my way not to like something.
Now I’m human and seeing the takedown of something really not very good isn’t something I’ve always been able to turn a blind eye too. If someone’s genuinely awful and nasty, I’m not averse to, er, ‘having my say’. But I think I’m done with putting extra effort into something so negative.
I’ve adopted this approach on social media for a while. I stop certain people creeping into my timeline by simply blocking them. I find I don’t get drawn into an outrage that’s something I can neither influence nor change, and I’m one of those rare people who finds Twitter a delightful place as a result. Just by shutting out the obvious, really.
None of this mitigates something sideswiping me and getting under my skin. Nor will it stop me adding the aforementioned song to the playlist at my funeral. But as I’m getting older, I’m seeing less and less point in walking into things for no other reason than to dislike or get annoyed. Turns out it can take a lot of effort to dislike something or someone, for precious little reward. I’m finding it best to ignore as best I can, and focus on the good stuff. I’d recommend it’s worth a try. It ain’t foolproof – and I am a fool who can prove that – but it does come with real benefits.
You all take care, and this column will return next week.
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